Andrea Edwards

I did my American Idol predictions a few weeks back, because it’s important to put one’s stake in the ground, but I am obviously either shit at it, or in a different world to the demographics voting on that show. Now I wasn’t upset about Pia going. There is no question this girl is phenomenal and will be joining the gang of three (Whitney, Mariah and Celine), but I was getting a bit bored with the ballads and the stilted performances every week. I also think she was too “perfect” for the American public and that’s what got her voted off. She’ll be right though – Pia is heading for mega-star land – no question. Naima, an early favourite of mine, had a rough start, but once she got her hearing sorted (thanks to Mark Anthony I reckon) she was awesome and entertaining. I think she just got too cool for school with her reggae song, and while I thought wow, I can see her music becoming the future choice for backpacker hang outs all over the world, as Bob Marley is now, the voting public obviously couldn’t see that. I really wonder how powerful the tween vote is over there? Would love to see the demographics. Thia and Ashton were understandable vote offs. Thia has a future tho – she’s 15 and what a voice! Karen Rodriguez was a shame, mainly because I don’t think she managed her music choices that well, but I hope she releases a record – a Latino superstar of the future I reckon. So now we have two girls left – Lauren and Haley. I think they’re both tops and while Lauren is still young, she has an amazing voice and I’m sure she’s picking up the votes, young and old. Haley might struggle after last night as the only one criticised, but I dig her raspy voice – that is how I love my women to sing. I hope she stays. The women certainly need to be represented, but at this point, Lauren’s got the best chance. Like JLo, I am very concerned by the lack of support for female contestants. Come on America. We’re going to start thinking you’re women haters in the rest of the world! So who’s going tonight? For me it’s Jakob or Stefano. Both sensational singers with immense talent, but I’m a bit bored with Jakob (like I was with Pia) and Stefano remains a bit wanky as a performer for my liking. But that’s just me. I’m sure the little girls voting out there love him. Scotty is sweet as they come, but not sure how much further he can go – but then who knows? Casey blew me away last night – I LOVED him but Steve thought it was crap. Will that hurt him? People who didn’t get the jazz vibe? We shall soon see. And James doing heavy metal – ROCK ON! It was awesome and fantastic to see on the Idol stage – I’ve definitely got a slight penchant for heavy metal I must admit. Finally there is Paul with that gorgeous smile, funky suits and sexy voice – my cup of tea and I’ll definitely buy his music one day. In fact, I can see myself buying Naima, Paul, Casey and Haley – all very much my style, but will any of them make it to the end? All I know is this season of American Idol is magnificent – really really. But I can’t vote, and of my top four only three remain – so I’d better go and watch the results to see if I’ve lost anyone on my list. Oh wait, has anyone else had enough of the studio mentor stuff with Jimmy and the crew? I want the guests back – Harry Connick Jr. and co. With that said, I do appreciate that this change to Idol might be the trick that’s making the show more sensational this year – contestants getting that real and consistent professional advice – but the guest superstars really did add some sizzle to the show – I miss it. Yours, without the bollocksAndrea PS: appreciate that there’s a lot of awesomes and magnificents and sensationals in this blog, but it really is a magical year on Idol, so I don’t apologise for that!

A couple of nights ago I said to Noemi, our maid, that if she wasn’t happy working with us (because the boys are extremely demanding right now,) that she needed to tell us and we’d do everything we could to help her find a new employer. This was on the back of two weeks of school holidays and during that time; the boys ran absolute rings around her. She just hasn’t been able to work out how to “control” them and while she was never alone with them, she’s really struggled finding her way. We were starting to get a little concerned, because we need someone who can really help out with the lads when we work, so the other night I decided to give Noemi the opportunity to decide if this is what she wanted. She’s decided it isn’t. Noemi is a very sweet, gentle and lovely lady, however our boys are rambunctious, adventurous and determined, so it’s not an ideal mix we’ve discovered. The boys don’t need someone strict (that’s our job,) they need someone who is firm enough to show them they won’t take any nonsense and playful enough to distract them away from dangerous situations. We know our boys – they’re full on. The amount of times complete strangers have run across parks to “rescue” Lex – he’s the climber – has been mind-boggling. Every time these strangers get involved we’ve been standing right there (in our catching position,) so it’s been a bit perplexing. We’ll say to them, ‘it’s OK, it’s just what he does.’ But you can see their hair turning grey at the sight of a three year old scaling such heights. Mates have been very anxious around Lex too, even after we’ve explained what he’s like. I suppose we’re just used to it and don’t always appreciate what a spin-out it can be. Lex’s climbing ambitions started at 10 months old and it hasn’t stopped. If there is something to climb, anything, he climbs it, but he’s also very good at it. He has incredible balance and technique, has rarely fallen, and we figure we’ve got to let him do what he needs to do to explore the world. Hey, he freaks us out too and we both have nightmares regularly, but at least we know his limitations and have always adopted a policy of being in a position to catch him if he falls. It’s happened once. But Noemi just couldn’t cope with Lex’s climbing – it’s completely freaked her out and she was terrified something terrible would happen while he was in her care – fair enough. Jax, on the other hand, has turned into the most confident, determined and strong-willed three year old on the planet, and he wants to make a very firm mark on the world. He talks to everyone, argues with everyone, has his way of doing things and screw you if you suggest another way, and he is also going through a not-listening-unless-you-yell phase. It can be pretty tedious with him right now, as he has a tendency to wander off to do as he wants, screw the consequences, but he’s growing up, and we hope things will calm down as he discovers we respect who he is and who he wants to be. PLEASE don’t take a long time for this stage to be over Jax, you’re sending us nuts! But Jax is a very cool dude. He’s the cautious one (thank the lord we got one!) but he’s also extremely charming, very funny and extremely sensual – he’s a cack, truly. We have absolutely no concerns for him when his time comes to go out into the world. He’s certainly going to get laid a lot. Our boys are amazing. They’re not easy for sure, but they are really wonderful – hey they’re my sons so of course I’m going to say that. Our goal with our kids has always been for them to be happy, confident and not frightened to take life by the balls… well I can say they are already there, and while it’s not easy now, it’s going to serve them well in life. In the meantime, we need help, but it’s got to be a special lady. Vick, our last helper, could’ve coped. She was playful, firm, took no nonsense and the boys loved being with her. I don’t know if we’ll be able to find another Vick, and we know we shouldn’t be looking for one, but the person who comes into our lives definitely has to have some pretty unique qualities and a lot of strength. Everything else is easy, but the boys, well that’s work right now, and I know because I’ve done it pretty-much alone for the last two years. Wish us luck as we start the process again and if anyone is looking for a really wonderful maid, I highly recommend Noemi – just not to people who have boys like ours! Maybe we need two maids… Yours, without the bollocksAndrea

I’ve got to say my LEAST favourite thing about being a mother is the bloody kids moaning. I mean, do these kids know how bloody lucky they have it? Do kids in most “first” world countries know? My mate Jaimey recently said kids are more protected, coddled and spoilt than ever before, which makes sense right? We now have fewer kids and they live longer, so we’re more focused on them, especially as we are doing it later, but the moaning… it drives me nuts! We’re coming to the end of two weeks of school holidays. This morning they were entertained at three floors of indoor climbing and adventure fun – but were they happy? Last night it was the British Club, with a water park, playground, little kids room, big kids room, etc, etc, etc, – but were they happy? We’ve never lived in a house with a backyard, and because our boys are not indoor kids, they are taken out for adventures twice a day. During this time we are completely focused on them enjoying themselves, but I tell ya, you wouldn’t know they are the centre of our world. So when we have days like the last couple with our lads, I wonder why we bother. I mean, in my day, we were thrown in the backyard, with no hats or sun block, and screamed at to come in for lunch, or it was dispatched out to us. We weren’t supervised, we did what the hell we wanted, and somehow we survived childhood, considering how much time we spent on the roof, up trees and in the pool. Although all of us have pretty severe sunburn scars as proof of this. I’ve never worn a backless dress. Our car is also an outstanding memory. We had a Datsun wagon for sometime there, and it consisted of two seats in front and a wagon in the back, with a fabric cover. In the winter it was bloody freezing, in the summer a sweat box with no windows to open (except the rear flap and the exhaust was delightful!) and the best bit? There were no chairs – just some corrugated metal for us to sit on. A treat was driving 300kms or so down to Melbourne or Geelong, ‘cos then we had a blow up mattress put in, until one day our Great Aunt Bel felt sorry for us and gave us a cushion – but it only fit three of us. When we fought for the front seat, we had really good reasons for wanting it. Mark, the youngest of us, usually lost out. But we were beautiful. The Edwards family would turn up in our Datsun ute for Wodonga Citizen Brass Band rehearsals, with four kids piling out the back, along with two tubas, a euphonium and a couple of cornets – maybe even a triangle if mum was still participating. You could see and hear us for miles around. Volume was always the order of the day in our household. So here I am trying to give my kids something completely different – not because my childhood was bad (I actually loved it because I was free and we did lots of great stuff) but because I want them to have a more global childhood. I think that would be a cool thing to give them. My boys are freer than most kids, they rarely get “stopped” from doing something unless it’s going to kill them, the day is focused on their happiness in the world, their diet is designed to help them be all they can be, they are never without water, nice clothes, and I could go on, but sometimes it just feels like we can never do enough. I attended a Deepak Chopra course on leadership a couple of years ago and I asked him why kids in “my” world are always cracking the shits and demanding more, when poor street kids, like you see in India, rarely make a fuss. And you know why? When a kid is starving, they are focused on getting food in their belly. When they are full and never know what it’s like to go without, they are like our kids. I’d rather have my kids never knowing what it’s like to be without to the point they don’t fight for more “stuff,” but sometimes, I just wish they’d shut the hell up with all their moaning and appreciate how good they’ve got it. I just hope one day they say thanks Mum and Dad – we had a great childhood. The next chapter will be about nagging, which has commenced full force… Naturally, it goes without saying that I was an absolute angel when I was a child… Yours, without the bollocksAndrea

Well here’s something special, truly bizarre, and a little bit delicate, so be warned, it might not suit everyone’s taste to read about an activity involving the anus… You have been warned! My Kiwi mate Naomi mentioned a recent episode of the Kardashian sisters (I have no idea why they are still on TV but there you go – voyeurism I suppose) and apparently they got their anuses bleached. I immediately thought what? Sometimes I wonder if I’m really behind the times, because until this week, I’d never even heard of it. Click on the title for a link to a Marie Claire article on the topic. Naturally I had to look it up, and while it’s a tad obvious, I am more interested in the why. According to Wikipedia, “Anal bleaching is the process of lightening the color of the skin around the anus. It is done for cosmetic purposes, to make the anus more uniform with the surrounding area. “Procedure – some treatments are applied in an office by a technician and others are sold as cream that can be applied in the privacy of your own home. Many people have started to lean towards treatments that can be done at home for privacy reasons and for the fact that most at home anal lightening creams do not contain the potentially carcinogenic ingredient hydroquinone. This ingredient is banned in many European countries but is still used in the USA at a potency of up to 2%.” Hydroquinone is used in whitening products all over the world, however its use is now banned in many countries because it is considered a carcinogen. Check out the skin cancers people are getting because of skin whitening products – especially in the poorer countries where the ethics of businesses providing these creams are not as good as in richer countries – although the US doesn’t rank too highly. In case you didn’t know, hydroquinone is used in photo production. Most of us have been in the vicinity of photo production facilities – imagine putting something that smells like that on your bumhole? Hello! Apparently porn stars and exotic dancers started this trend, and obviously most of us will understand why to an extent – it does get pretty close and personal for the viewer after all. I can even understand transsexuals (male-to-female) taking this path as they feminise themselves, but for the rest of us, with the risks so high – WHY? And who actually sees it? According to Gay Life they suggest that “prolonged use of hydroquinone can thicken collagen fibres, resulting in a spotty skin appearance. Long term mercury, a known carcinogenic, strips skin of its natural pigment. Prolonged exposure to either can cause cancer, mercury poisoning, liver or kidney failure. Anal bleaching can also cause chemical burns to an already sensitive area.” The reality is, from what I uncovered, there are always risks with this stuff, no matter how “safe” it is purported to be. People are dabbing hydroquinone and mercury on a very sensitive part of their body to make it paler, and all the while, the body absorbs it upwards. Livers and kidneys are going. Can you imagine the future of organ donation – people who desperately need new organs will be competing with anal bleaches? Another reason the illegal organ trade will continue to flourish. I ain’t got a problem with people beautifying themselves. Get your boobs done if they make you unhappy, get unsightly things chopped from your body, a tummy tuck, do the botox thing if you really need to… but this? Something that can kill you or make you very very sick? Because it’s a bumhole people. After the Kardashian sisters’ did their thing on anul bleaching, I saw lots of comments on one of their sites asking the girls for recommendations on creams to use. People are really getting into it. It is shows like this with a strong following and influence, that need to start appreciating they have a responsibility by not encourage potentially lethal cosmetic activities. I mean shouldn’t they? Am I being too extreme here? Maybe a bit sanctimonious? Check out the comments beneath the article (on a different story – one of them bikini-waxed the other and she’s talking about her puffy vagina – nice!) and you’ll see what I mean. What demographic follows these women? Frightening. I am often stupefied by what people are willing to do to their bodies to be “beautiful.” If people spent as much time working on their insides as they did on their outsides, the world would be a much better place – I reckon anyway. So any anal bleaches out there willing to admit it? Anyone sitting on a hot ring piece ‘cos they had a reaction? Yours, without the bollocksAndrea

My mate Tash posted a blog about a recent online dating experience she had entitled: “Close Encounters of a Turd Kind.” He was a real charmer – claiming he’d “had” 628 women – one can only presume he meant shags – what a legend!! Anyways Tash is back in the game, hoping to find her love at last but experiences like this can be a bit of a kick in the teeth. It’s a hard and lonely place in single-land most of the time and I admire Tash for being willing to share this experience with her followers. I never did the online dating thing. I just couldn’t believe that I’d ever find anyone who’d suit me. I mean how would I advertise myself? If you’re looking for a charming, sweet lady to introduce to your mum, I’m probably not it. Or if you don’t mind a gal who swears like a trooper, loves being physically strong, lives life hard, is adventurous, speaks her mind, has strong ideas… then give me a call. I’m not against online dating, I just knew it wasn’t for me. I was single from 24 to 33. During that time I had a lot of fun, travelled a lot, enjoyed my work, and met a tonne of great people, but the whole time I was forever hopeful that one day, I would meet my love. Life is a hell of a lot better when you’ve got someone to share it all with don’t you think? But I only believe it’s great when you find the RIGHT one. Nine years later I found him. I was 33 and the love of my life finally came along. His name is Steve and he continues to be everything I hoped for and a lot lot more. Steve is my perfect match – kind of a male version of me (as I am a female version of him) and when we met and fell in love, I realised the idea that opposites attract might be bullshit – at least for us. It was our similarities that really bound us tightly together and we are two very happy little bunnies. When I introduced Steve to my mates, many of them said he’s exactly what you said you always wanted. One gorgeous friend Kirsti said it’s amazing, he is exactly what you’ve talked about for all these years, and you’ve found him. She said she’d spent her time thinking about what she didn’t want and, guess what? She always attracted that type of person – dickheads. So it got me thinking, was it my focus on what I wanted that helped find him? Then the Law of Attraction, manifesting your life, and all of that stuff hit the world, and I realised it could be true – I was a living embodiment of it after all. During those years I never stopped thinking about the man I wanted in my life, and all through that lean time, those thoughts were always foremost in my mind. I really believed that one day he’d walk through my door – I believed it so deeply, it kept me going when I too had “encounters of a turd kind.” All single people can talk about turd times. They are mega kicks in the nuts or snatch when they happen because all you want is to find someone nice, and it feels so impossible when you meet idiots. So that is what I’m sharing here. It is the focus on what you want in your life that will result in getting what you want. I do believe it worked for me in regards to love (but for many other areas of my life too) so be patient with me here, because if it helps one person, that would be awesome. My recipe for finding true love is really simple. Focus on what you want – all aspects – and keep this in your mind and heart every chance you get to daydream about your future. Any time you start thinking of an arsehole or bitch you’ve encountered along the way, shut that thinking down immediately, and redirect it to your ideal partner. Remember the law of attraction is absolute – if you allow yourself to think about what you don’t want, guess what, you’ll get exactly that. Let your imagination soar and live this ideal relationship in your head and heart. Imagine how being with them will make you feel, the smile you’ll see on your face, how much you are going to laugh and all of the wonderful things you’re going to do together. Live it and believe it. Naturally your logical side will kick in and tell you what a bunch of bullshit. You’ve got to ignore that and say “fuck off logic – why can’t I fantasize about this with no rules attached?” That’s the great thing about imagination – there are no rules. Picture your ideal partner, physically, emotionally and spiritually. I say physically because hey, you’ve got to like looking at them too. Being attracted is important whether people admit it or not, but chemistry is chemistry, so while your spunk may not be my spunk, they’re still a spunk. For example, I love men with big thighs and big shoulders and that’s exactly Steve. I went weak at the knees when I saw those thighs and shoulders for the first time seven years ago. In my world, a man’s gotta be a man but we’ve all got different ideas about that. So think about how they look if that’s important to you. But you’ve got to go deep. I needed someone with the same or similar values. I needed to know that even if something wasn’t important to them, they’d respect when something was important to me. I needed someone who laughed at the same stupid shit and who thought I was the dogs bollocks. I needed someone who wasn’t intimidated or scared of the sort of woman I

Have you ever been in a situation where someone asks your opinion or feelings about something and you tell them? We all have huh? My point? Many times the asker of the question repeats what you said, the only problem is, it’s not what you said. Naturally, when this happens, most of us say ‘no I didn’t mean that, I meant this.’ Again, they say sure, you said this….. And on it goes. This isn’t based on something that happened to me recently. It’s just a thought that’s been rattling around in my head from many of these experiences in my life and I’ve been thinking about it – for whatever reason I think about this stuff. When I was younger and this happened to me, I’d almost fight, trying to make people understand what I was trying to say. In the end, I would often give up because I wasn’t getting through, and sometimes they’d give up, because I was obviously pissing them off not letting it drop. As I get older, I give it a go once, maybe twice if it’s important to me, but usually, I just let it go. People hear what they hear. I find it a curious example of how us humans listen to things within the context of our own values and opinions. We hear what others say, but we interpret from our own experiences. Therefore it doesn’t matter what we say, our listener hears what they hear. I’ve learnt it’s easier if we just accept this human phenomenon and don’t fight it – not always easy I know. Most of us do this. Most of us are guilty of it. I think it’s just part of the human condition and most of the time we wouldn’t even know we were doing it. I’m sure I’ve done it a million times! We’ve all heard cases where 10 people witness an accident and when the police interview the witnesses, every story is different. Or the psychology team at university run an experiment with 12 people running naked across a field wearing different hats and everyone who sees them is asked what they saw. Everyone saw something different. Why? It’s because we’re all different. We all have different values, we all have different beliefs, we all see the world in our own way – it’s what makes life beautiful because that’s diversity. We’ve all had different upbringings with different types of parents and some of us have shaken off our parental influence and opinions, while some of us hold on tight and become an advocate for those beliefs. Sometimes that’s a good thing, sometimes it’s a bad thing – say if you had really racist parents and you grow into a racist yourself. Stepping away from your foundational beliefs and questioning what you’ve learnt – from your parents, school, church, friends… it ain’t always easy. Then you meet people from other cultures and religions and sometimes, you’ve got no synergy at all, because your foundations are so different, there seems to be no middle line where you can reach each other. That’s why we’ve still got wars right – it’s got to be? We don’t make sense to each other. What we value is just too different. Age can be a big part of it. Many people get freer the older they get – breaking away from any “mind shackles” they have been trapped in. But some get more committed to their beliefs as they get older. The scars of life are often contributors to this, as real heart break can send us off the path, or it can get us more firmly entrenched on it – we just don’t know. Some “tests” can be very harsh and all I hope is that I am able to come out freer, happier and more accepting – but there could be tests I wouldn’t be able to survive mentally. I suppose it’s all about how we deal with the shit storms that can strike any of us throughout our lives… I definitely find this a curious aspect of being human and I suppose I just try to listen harder without putting my own opinions or ideas on people’s comments and hope everyone does the same for me. I don’t know if I am successful doing this though, because how can I know? No matter what, my world exists from the perspective I place on it, I suppose I’ve just got to make sure that’s a good perspective, but that’s still a perspective. What do you reckon it’s all about then? Yours, without the bollocksAndrea

Have you ever read a book that you enjoyed so much, not only did you feel disappointed when you finished it, but you couldn’t pick up another book for a few days because you wanted to relish in the story a little longer? I just finished one – “The Help” by Kathryn Stocket. I decided I had to blog about it (even though my book blogs rarely get a response) because it is one of the best reads I’ve enjoyed in a long time and I read A LOT!. Based in early 60s Mississippi, it’s a story based around one white woman and two “coloured” maids and their perspectives of life in that time. If you think back to the early 60s, it was the era of Kennedy, Dr. Martin Luther King, segregation, the KKK, lynching’s, the events the movie “Mississippi Burning” is based upon, and the time white women went to college to find husbands – aka Julia Robert’s movie “Mona Lisa Smile.” Definitely a colourful period of time to be writing about and, hopefully, a time no more. I’m not going to tell you too much about it l’est I spoil it, but Skeeter, the white woman, is a typical Southerner – as far as I know – wealthy and everyone’s goal is for her to be married to a rich, nice, white man. Unfortunately she’s tall and not considered traditionally pretty. She’s friends with the local society ladies though and she plays bridge every week, tennis at the club, and life isn’t about questioning too many things. The difference is Skeeter had an amazing maid called Constantine who raised her and she loved this woman. But Constantine is gone from her life and she misses her. Constantine was fired when she was at college and no one will tell her why she’s gone – not even her mother. When she starts asking Aibileen – her friend’s maid – the reaction is pretty strong and Skeeter knows there’s more to it. To cut a long story short, Skeeter, Aibileen and her friend Minny, eventually get together to write a book in secret about what it’s really like to work as a coloured maid for the white women of Jackson, Mississippi. There are a lot of non-starts, threats, and if they get caught they will probably be killed, but with all the risk, they go for it and the story unfolds as it goes. Aibileen is an older woman who lost her only beloved son in his early 20s in a work accident. Broken hearted by this loss, she’s a brilliant, wise old dame who quotes simple philosophies on life that make you smile. You know how some people just make life simple but there’s so much wisdom in their simplicity? That’s Aibileen and she’s the sort of character who makes you feel ashamed for being lazy. My word these women worked hard. Minny is a mother of five, with an abusive husband and her work never stops. But she’s a cantankerous woman who doesn’t take shit from no one, even though she’s lost multiple jobs because of her attitude – I loved her. She also knows how to get her own back, and she did that with one of Skeeters best friends – this awful woman called Hilly. Hilly represented everything ignorant (in my mind) of that time. Definitely a colourful character in the book. It’s an amazing book. It’s about ignorance, how human’s can unquestionably follow unwritten rules, how we accept the norm, how differences on the surface divide us and what we miss by that separation, it’s about trust or lack of trust, and it’s also about a brutal time in America’s history. I really loved it but a word of warning. If you have an exam, something you need to finish, obligations that require your attention – don’t read this now. Steve kept interrupting me and I wanted to smack him – it’s just one of those rare yarns you want to immerse yourself in. If you get it, I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Yours, without the bollocksAndrea

I have been mesmerised by a book “Half the Sky – How to Change the World,” by Nicholas D. Kristof and Sheryl Wudunn. “Half the Sky” is based on an old Chinese proverb “Women hold up half the sky” and essentially the message is we’re in it together and the empowerment of women is fundamental for the future of humanity. This book takes you through all of the major issues affecting women in the world, but also how those issues, if tackled correctly, can improve not just women’s lives, but everyone’s lives. It is an incredibly balanced book, it doesn’t judge, and probably most importantly, it doesn’t point the finger of blame at men. In fact, when relevant, it focuses on how women can be the ones responsible for truly horrendous customs (in my opinion,) like female genital mutilation. The key issues facing women around the world include things like sexual slavery, female education, maternal mortality, female infanticide, family planning, honour rapes and honour killings, AIDs and STDS, as well as lack of education, amongst many other things. But it also focuses on the amazing things being done, not by the global aid groups, but at the local level by people who understand the issues because they live the issues. It looks at microcredit and how this has enhanced everyone’s lives. It tells the story of Mukhtar Mai, a Pakistani woman gang raped as punishment for her brother’s “supposed” crime, but rather than kill herself, as she would be expected to do, she’s gone on to set up schools for women all over Pakistan. It hasn’t come without its troubles, but what an amazing woman. As they say in the book, don’t hit people with figures, tell them individual stories – that is when people act. The book talks about fistulas and the devastating impact this has on women’s lives. Fistulas were once common all over the world, but they are repaired instantly in most countries. In Africa, they destroy lives. Don’t know what a fistula is? Check out www.fistulafoundation.org who explain: “A fistula is simply a hole between an internal organ and the outside world that should not exist. There are two primary causes of fistula in women in developing countries: childbirth, causing obstetric fistula and sexual violence, causing traumatic fistula. “Obstetric fistula is the most devastating of all childbirth injuries. “An obstetric fistula develops when blood supply to the tissues of the vagina and the bladder (and/or rectum) is cut off during prolonged obstructed labor. The tissues die and a hole forms through which urine and/or faeces pass uncontrollably. Women who develop fistulas are often abandoned by their husbands, rejected by their communities, and forced to live an isolated existence.” This book talks about global aid and how some has worked brilliantly, but how the politicization of aid can essentially kill people. Sometimes it’s because of a lack of understanding of cultures, but also because of pressure at home. For example, George W. Bush cut off funding to Mary Stopes International because this organisation was helping to provide abortions in China. Naturally the conservative Christians and pro-lifers are big Bush supporters, but do you know what happened? “The funding cut forced Mary Stopes to drop a planned outreach program to help Somali and Rwandan refugees. It had to close two clinics in Kenya and to lay off eighty doctors and nurses.” Who knows how many lives were lost because of this – both mothers and babies? Doesn’t seem like a very pro-life or Christian stance to me. These women are refugees – I cannot even imagine how hard their lives are – and having given birth to two children myself, I long for a world where everyone gets a similar standard of care. Thankfully Barrack Obama resumed funding to Mary Stopes. From the book: “Driven in part by conservative Christians, Republican presidents, including both Bushes, instituted the ‘gag rule,’ barring funds to any foreign aid group that, even with other money, counselled women about abortion options or had any links to abortions. As a result, said a Ghanaian doctor, Eunice Brookman-Amissah, ‘contrary to its stated intentions, the global gag rule results in more unwanted pregnancies, more unsafe abortions, and more deaths of women and girls.” It’s a frightening world out there on many levels, but this book doesn’t leave you reeling with shock and horror, it gently informs and talks us through some pretty painful stories and how sometimes people get free of their hell. It is hopeful, simple and inspiring. I’ve wanted to do something for a long time, and this has consolidated my thoughts. I have an idea so will share it with you when I have time to formulate it. In the meantime, the book leaves us with four things we can do in the next 10 minutes that can change lives. Here they are in summary:1. Go to http://www.globalgiving.org/ or http://www.kiva.org/ and open an account. I love Kiva, but will check out globalgiving too – any money you pay goes directly to the people 2. Sponsor a girl or a woman through Plan International, Women for Women International, World Vision, or American Jewish World Service3. Sign up for email updates on http://www.womensenews.org/ – done! As well as http://www.worldpulse.com/ – done!4. Join the CARE Action Network at www.can.care.org If you want to do research into worthy aid groups, http://www.charitynavigator.org/ and http://www.givewell.net/ enable you to understand who’s doing what and where you’re money goes – so if you do not want to contribute towards paying rent for swanky offices in NYC or high salaries, these sites show you how money is being spent. Also, did you know that really basic initiatives can change lives? School uniforms mean more girls go to school If girls have sanitary napkins they’re more likely to go to school De-worming increases school attendance and attention span Iodine improves brain health – apparently tens of millions of children lose 10 IQ points because of iodine deficiency while their brains are being formed in

I took down a blog yesterday. I took it down because it hurt someone’s feelings, someone I care about. I am not in this blog game to hurt people, so it is gone. I expect people to disagree with my opinions and to even give other perspectives – which I LOVE – but hurt, nope, not me and not how I want to live my life. So apologies. It was unintentional but none of us are perfect. Yours, without the bollocksAndrea

Well we’re off to another tragic start in the natural disaster rankings in 2011. I found this interesting blog http://www.jesusblogspot.com/2011/01/natural-disasters-2011-recap-of-first.html so if you’re into Jesus, a good blog to follow (I’m not a potential candidate) but interestingly, it talks about the first 12 days of 2011. You’ll notice a lot of dead bird happenings going on… which I never even heard about, but of course, many think the end of days is due when birds fall out of the sky. We all believe different things right? Here is the first 12 days, according to jesusblogspot, typos and all: Earthquake magnitude 6.9 Argentina – January 1 Earthquake magnitude 5.2 – Southern XinJiang, China – January 1 Earthquake 7.1 magnitude Chile – January 2 More Than 1,000 Dead Birds Fall From Sky in Arkansas – January 2 Dead fish cover 20-mile section of Arkansas River – January 2 Uganda yellow fever outbreak kills more than 40 – January 3 Earthquake Near Japan Triggers Tsunami Warning – January 3 Powerful earthquake hits south-east Iran – January 3 Earthquake 7.0 magnitude hits northern Argentina – January 3 Hundreds of dead blackbirds found in Louisiana – January 3 10,000s of Birds found dead in Manitoba – January 3 (apparently a province in Canada) Thousands of Birds fall from the sky in South America – January 3 Major Flood in Rockhampton, Australia – January 3 Dead Birds Found In Kentucky – January 4 100 tons of dead fish wash up on Brazil’s shores – January 4 Hundreds of dead birds found in East Texas – January 5 Dead birds in Sweden, millions of dead fish in Maryland, Brazil and New Zealand -January 5 Shift of Earth’s magnetic north pole affects Tampa airport – January 5 (that’s in Florida) 40,000 crabs found dead on England beaches – January 6 Heavy floods leave at least 35 dead in Brazil – January 6 Earthquake 4.5 magnitude in California – January 12 Huge Waves Destroy Homes in E. Indonesia – January 12 Of course there’s been a lot more. Extensive flooding in Queensland (not just Rockhampton) and Victoria, Australia, but also in Sri Lanka, South Africa, Indonesia, Angola, Germany, the US and many more areas. There have been mega blizzards and record low temperatures in the Northern Hemisphere, as well as bushfires in Western Australia and a mega cyclone in North Queensland. It’s been a crazy time in nature and this isn’t even everything. To give you some perspective, according to Channel News Asia (http://www.channelnewsasia.com/) and interpreted by myself, here’s how it stands – 2010 was an exceptional year. Remember Haiti? Most of us have put the Haiti earthquake to the back of our minds, as well as the floods in Pakistan and China. But these three events killed 295,000 people and cost the insurance business US$130 billion. Apparently the last time so many people died in disasters was in 1983, when 300,000 people died, mainly due to famine in Ethiopia. But then of course in 2004 nearly 250,000 died due to the tsunami around these parts, but that didn’t get a mention in this article. Nor did the huge Pakistan Earthquake a few years back… In 2010, 950 natural disasters were recorded, making it the second worst year since 1980. The average number of events over the past 10 years is 785 – and who knows what is measured. To give you an idea of deaths last year, 222,570 people died in Haiti (with three million left homeless,) 56,000 died in a combination of heatwaves and forest fires in Russia, the earthquake in China killed 2,700, floods in Pakistan killed 1,760, and August floods in China killed another 1,470. And that’s just deaths – the ramifications for those left living are rarely quantified… The American continent suffered the most disasters – 365 in total – with 310 in Asia. A total of 120 natural disasters were recorded in Europe, 90 in Africa and 65 in Australia and Oceania. Apparently an “average” year sees 77,000 dying in natural disasters. Many of us are glued to the footage coming out of Japan, and before that we were glued to what was coming out of Christchurch and Australia. It’s completely horrifying and almost impossible to understand. I find that unless you’ve been to a place impacted, or understand the culture of the place hit, we just can’t comprehend what it is like. So we sit and watch houses being washed away, ships plummeting into bridges, collapsed buildings full of who knows how many people, cars and trucks racing from the onslaught and not making it – it’s very heart breaking. And then there’s the whole nuclear fallout coming into question. Many of us might wonder what those people were like? How did they live their days? Did they have a good heart or do they wish they could have lived a better life? What were their final thoughts? What were they doing when the waves hit? Feeding their children? Making love? Praying? How did they face that moment of their death? How terrified were they? I have friends in Japan and everyone is Facebooking them saying get out, come home! But is “home” any safer? Are we really “safe” anywhere? And why do humans cling so desperately to living anyway? Why are we like that? As most of us are aware, the world is a giant ball of energy and sometimes that energy needs to get out. We’ve inhabited this world and sometimes we’ve chosen to do so in parts that are high risk. We’ve known that for a long time and we choose to stay put. We buy land, build houses and sometimes they get knocked down and a lot of people die… is that Mother Nature’s fault? I don’t think she’s “angry” at us, she just doesn’t give a shit. She’s got a job to do, and releasing her energy is a part of it. She’s constantly evolving and balancing herself –that’s what she does. Additionally, we’re at the