My FIE focus for February was off to a cracking start, and then my life was turned upside down, inside out, and back-to-front, so let’s just say, I lost focus. There are definitely aspects I have persisted with – including one huge change – but many fell by the way-side as I moved into a new life of full-time work.
I obviously need to adjust a lot of things to ensure I fully integrate my personal and professional goals together – because this stuff needs to happen no matter what – however giving myself a break as I go through a time of great change is something I need to give myself permission to do. Being gentler with myself is an overarching goal of FIE after all.
The first thing to get screwed up was wheat free. During the first few days in my new job, I didn’t know where I could buy food, and when lunch meetings happened with food supplied, I thought heck, just go with the flow. I also had Jax’s 5th b’day in the mix. The problem, though, is it made me a little more apathetic about my wheat free conviction overall, so I gave myself a talking to and regained the required discipline – because it is about discipline. Wheat free is pretty hard here, but if you really commit to it, you can do it.
I am also going to do a cheat day every week so I can enjoy the things I miss the most, and you know one of the main things I miss? Poached eggs with ham on toast… weirdo I know!
From a physical point of view, February has been a disaster. It is raining heavily EVERY night in Singapore, so the walk has gone out the window. I’m also getting home really late, and even though I need to put my runners on and go once the boys are in bed, I haven’t done it. The truth is, even if it wasn’t raining, I probably wouldn’t have gone because I’ve come home bewilderingly exhausted every night. It’s been an intense change of life. Also because it’s raining, the pool is cold, so I haven’t been swimming. And yes, pools do get cold in Singapore, although people visiting think I’m bloody nuts when I say it’s cold… So I haven’t achieved that goal.
Liquid ingestion habit changes have been interesting. In the first two weeks, no problem drinking three liters of water, although I discovered being in close proximity to a toilet is really important. Also not being stuck in traffic jams is important too… I had a few VERY close calls. However, in the second two weeks of February, I’ve probably been drinking three liters of coffee instead as my body adjusts to regular working hours. Obviously, not something that can continue…
Green tea is great and I’m at one cup consistently. I’m definitely enjoying it and can see it becoming a regular fixture. BUT the cup of hot water with lemon and ginger in it… or even just lemon… well I hated it! I know people love it, but it made me gag every morning, and it takes too long when I’m trying to rush scalding hot lemon water, then breakfast, then coffee down the hatch before rushing out the door. So it wasn’t working.
Reconsidering my desire to line my stomach with something alkaline, before anything else, first thing in the morning, I found a solution. In our fridge is a bottle of lovely cold water and in this water is lemon grass, lemon (or lime or orange), fresh mint and cucumber. A big cold glass is the first thing that enters my body and I love it – which is very important, because loving it ensures success.
If you want to do something easy for yourself, try it out. Just put whatever amount of the ingredients you want into a big water bottle, and then drink. The longer the food is in the water, the stronger the flavour, and the same bottle can be topped up over a few days before changing the ingredients. If you serve it at dinner parties, you’ll really impress your guests too.
Moving onto thoughts, while feeling extremely grateful for my three loves, my life, my work, etc, etc, etc… I didn’t do what I intended – a series of gratefulness blogs over every aspect of my life throughout the month. I’ll move that one to March I think.
I did, however, start to tackle one of my most dis-empowering thought habits – my obsession with sleep and tiredness. I wrote a blog on it earlier in the month, and with the whole starting a new job thing, it was my greatest achievement this month.
Whenever I find myself going into tiredness thinking, I tell myself “you have energy.” Whenever I’m facing a late night to bed – I tell myself “so bloody what, it’s not going to kill you?” And whenever I have a shocking night’s sleep I say, “so bloody what, get over it.”
If you are not someone obsessed by tiredness or sleep, you won’t understand this, and while you’ll almost certainly have some other thought habit that is strange to me, this habit has definitely consumed me. Steve also finds it bizarre (because he just doesn’t think about it), but then I find the fact he can stress about a flight with the boys two weeks (or even months) before we get on a plane, weird. We’re all a bit weird after all.
But I really do feel I’ve cracked this one. I know I will have to be really vigilant around thoughts on this, but I think I’m there, and that is one hell of an achievement for someone who’s spent years obsessed with it. Therefore, hooray for me!!
So “Fuck it, Enough” February had a lot of slip-ups, but seriously, tackling the sleep/tiredness thoughts is one of my great achievements so far. It’s a HUGE bad habit to break, and by focusing on it for a month, I think I’ve cracked it. No more dread when looking at the alarm clock for me…
Anyone else achieve anything significant this month? I’d love to know so share share share!!
Yours, without the bollocks