August 6, 2011

Do you think we’re here for a reason? Or do you think there’s no purpose – we live, we die, it’s all over? For many reasons I won’t have time to go into here (one was written up in my ghost shagging blog,) I think there is a purpose, and while I’m not sure what mine is, I’m keen to uncover it because I obviously haven’t done it yet, or maybe I have? Maybe having my lads was my purpose? Maybe it’s something else? I was reading Neale Donald Walsch again recently. He’s a very interesting dude who offers a completely different perspective on the divine/god/universe/etc… to anything I’ve ever uncovered – and it got me thinking about a two week period in my life back in 1995 – the two weeks before I left Australia to begin wandering the world – a journey I still find myself on. Not wandering seems to be something I’m incapable of doing… The first incident happened on Flinders St in Melbourne at the heart of the City. In 1995 it was a manically busy street, but on this day, it was dead and as I was driving along, I decided to do a U-turn. I looked all around, nothing, turned the car, and swish – a Melbourne tram went by. The thing is I know I was on that track. I felt the tram tracks under the car. The other thing I know is that a small hatch back and a Melbourne tram = one thing – death to the driver, as it should have crashed straight into the drivers’ door! I sat there stunned. I had looked around, but I didn’t seen the tram (and they are hard to miss) and somehow I was still alive. In fact, the car didn’t even get a scratch on it, which was lucky because I’d just sold it. A week later, I went out with a mate, and was driving home late at night. I was dog tired and driving towards the Tullamarine Freeway – back then, the Tullamarine Freeway was one of the busiest roads in Melbourne, full of mega trucks coming into the city. I was driving towards the intersection, and I saw a green light. I entered the intersection and could hear horns blasting. Things slowed down at this point. I looked to my right and saw 20 cars coming at me, I looked at the lights and they were indeed red, but I made it to the middle of the intersection without getting hit, at which point I slowly looked to the left, expecting to see a couple of big trucks bearing down on me. Nothing. The road was completely empty. I couldn’t have stopped if something was coming, so I crossed the intersection, parked on the side of the ride, and waited for my heart to slow down. My tiredness had gone. I have thought back on those two moments many times in my life, wondering why I didn’t die? I should have died. I have experienced many more moments like this in my life, been in extremely dangerous places with no harm coming to me, been in the back of buses as they were hanging off the edge of cliffs, been a passenger in shoddy planes that had no right flying, cancelled an appointment in the WTC on September 10th, and so many more near death experiences. I don’t know why, I just know that I have and it’s given me faith in one thing – not to be scared of living, because when it’s my time to die, I will. I don’t know when it will happen or how, but it doesn’t scare me – it really doesn’t. More important than worrying about dying is to make sure I do whatever I’m supposed to do while I’m here and in the meantime, mbrace life for all of the wonderful experiences it offers. So I’m wondering: has anyone else lived when they know they should have died? Does anyone else believe they have a destiny? Has anyone actually uncovered their destiny? Yours, without the bollocks Andrea