January 29, 2013

In recent months I’ve been doing a fair bit of home-schooling with my lads. This is not something I ever dreamed of doing and I have to say – it’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done! I definitely have new-found respect for home-schooling parents that’s for sure. However, with Lex’s speech delay we are also dealing with education delay, and I just want to make sure he’s caught up in all areas of his life so he can fly. He’s also hit that age where kids can be cruel and I don’t want him picked on or called stupid – ‘cos he’s certainly not stupid! In the process of doing this, I’ve had an epiphany. Many many times I’ve literally had to stop the words in my mouth from coming out, as I can feel a negative motivation coming out that is supposed to inspire them positively. That’s not me, but I think many of us were raised this way – ‘if you don’t work hard at school you’ll be collecting the garbage’, or ‘if you don’t get good grades you’ll be cleaning the streets’ or ‘you’re burning the candles at both ends’ (like that’s a bad thing) – but this is NOT how I want to raise my boys. I want to raise them with passion and enthusiasm for life, and have recognised I’ve got some old programs running in my head that were put there when I was a kid. This means when nothing else comes to mind, they just want to pop out. So I have decided to re-program my mind and come up with motivations that are positive and should exceed the desired outcome – for my boys to be great, passionate, kind men that are chasing dreams no one else but them thinks is possible. If I can do that as a parent, then I will have achieved something really magnificent – because I definitely don’t want them to be limited by any of the things I say. Before I start, I’d really LOVE to know what positive motivations other parents use? I’m planning on sticking a list on my bathroom mirror to really make them stick and would love some feedback – the more the merrier! 1.       Anything is possible – Reach for the stars my love, the view is awesome from there 2.       Love of learning – Learning is the greatest gift of life, it takes you to places of magic 3.       Dreams are yours to make – Work hard at school my love, because what you do today will ensure that every dream you have will be possible 4.       Focus on self – Don’t worry about anyone else – what they say or what they do – just always be the best You you can be 5.       Winning– Winning is the greatest feeling buds, so go for it and be a winner. BUT if you don’t win, that’s OK too, as long as you gave it your all. Remember to always ALWAYS shake the hand of anyone who beats you – because they also gave it their all too 6.       Winning (from a movie) – You don’t have to like it when you don’t win, so always remember to use it as fuel to drive you harder next time 7.       Self-belief– The sun shines out of your eyes my love, don’t let anyone else take that sunshine away 8.       Anger– Don’t waste time being angry – anger makes your body feel all yucky inside. Everyone makes mistakes, so forgive and forget, smile and move on 9.       More for anger – When people are angry towards you, most of the time it’s because they are hurting inside. Be kind towards angry people, because they often need it the most 10.   Bullies and compassion – Stand up for yourself and the people you love, but more importantly, stand up for anything or anyone who can’t stand up for themselves. There are bullies in this world, so if you stand up for yourself, they’ll leave you alone. If you stand up for others, they’ll leave them alone too. BUT talk to the bully – find out why they’re hurting ‘cos maybe you can help. There is nothing more important than compassion 11.   Kindness– Be kind to everyone and everything – the world needs more kind men 12.   Living life at full speed – Live life to the max my love. Take every opportunity to master the things you’re passionate about, laugh from the depths of your belly, dance in the rain, climb mountains, fear nothing, be open to everyone, treat life as the greatest teacher, love easily, respect everyone, and life will be awesome 13.   Be true to your word – when you give someone your word, honour it. If you just can’t, tell the person why and be honest. Many people have forgotten to honour their word, so be an example to everyone of what it means – because you can lift people up if you do 14.   Coping with disappointment – Disappointments will happen in your life – people will let you down, opportunities you are excited about won’t come to pass. Don’t worry. You’ve been given a gift, a lesson to learn, so learn the lesson and stay excited about the future. All is as it’s meant to be, and I bet you something better will come your way 15.   One I saw on Pinterest recently as a way to live – Wake up, be awesome, go back to sleep There you go, I spent 30 minutes in a taxi this morning putting this together and of course, many are inspired by the things I read. I know I could refine them and add a million others, but it’s a good start to re-programming my mind. Right, now it’s your turn – any little gems you use to positively motivate and inspire your kids? Yours, without the bollocks Andrea Join me on Facebook at Withoutthebollocks