A friend recently asked me if I’ve enjoyed doing some professional video shoots. Here’s one I’ve done and another if you’re interested. As you’ll notice, it’s not exactly Without the Bollocks style but hey, it’s work…
The move to video is a critical part of what I’m doing, but more importantly, if I want to contribute to changing the world and making it a better place, I’ve recognized it’s a vehicle I’ve got to get good at.
But having a camera shoved in your face and trying to remember to be smiley, charming and a little bit intelligent, well none of it is coming easily to me – yet…
So the answer to my friend’s question was simple. I’m not enjoying it, in fact, the whole experience was very much how it felt like giving birth!
Giving birth? Well yes, because when you check yourself into hospital – after all hell breaks loose in your body – only one thing is going to happen. That baby is coming out. Whether through your snatch or your stomach, it’s coming, and there ain’t anything you can do about it. You are not even remotely in control of that situation.
In the delivery room (in Singapore at least) when the time comes, you’re set up in bed, your feet put in stirrups, and then the worst thing that can ever happen, happens. All of you is exposed to the world, and you do this in front of a crowd. As if I was ever going to enjoy that part.
I know some women enjoy this experience, but not all of us do. I’m certainly not one of those who found birth beautiful. I couldn’t wait to get out of there.
So how did I cope? I took myself to a far-off place, completely detaching myself from my body, and watched the whole scenario play-out from above. It was the only way I could deal with it, because I detested it. All I could do was push real hard and get it over with. And boy did I push real hard.
Until that point, it was the only situation I had been in where I had absolutely no control over anything. And now I have done some videos.
For the first one, I turned up and the entire crew was there. About eight people, including an adorable make-up artist, who put me in a chair and did things to my hair and face that I would never in a million years do. Then it was camera time.
I had no decision on the angle, what they captured, where the cameras were, or anything. I was asked questions and answered them. We were also in a shared office space, so people were wandering through, checking out what was going on.
The second time was probably harder. A smaller crew, but it was done in the middle of the office with a whole host of people working quietly at desks around me. Ahhhhhhh.
So what can you do? Detach yourself from the reality, essentially get out of your body and watch it from afar. That’s it. You can’t do anything else.
I will do more videos. I have to. But I’m now a little wiser and will see if I can have a little more control – camera angles, venues, etc. I don’t know how successful I’ll be, but will give it a go. I’ve also noticed silk-style jackets aren’t the best choice. They don’t have firm enough structure, so they look baggy. Another consideration for future videos.
Putting yourself out there in new and frightening situations is not something I have ever shied away from. I feel the fear and say fuck it, but it’s not easy. Not easy at all. I’ll be doing my first Webinar soon too. Crikey. Another first to get through.
Tell me, what is your “detaching from the body” situation that you cringe about the most? I would love to hear from you, as well as hear any tips you’ve learnt to manage it?
Yours, without the bollocks
Andrea
