Many years ago, I was travelling through Central America, I came across the weirdest thing – a person with the ability to pulse their eyeballs. It happened in Mexico. I was out adventuring and along came this youngish Mexican lad who decided I was pretty hot. He offered me lots of wild sex and all the while, his eye balls were pulsing as he looked at me. He even took me to show me where we could enjoy such lewd activities in his single room hut – a bachelor pad he proudly informed me. Mum, Dad, Grandma and the rest of the extended family were about two metres away in the next hut.

Naturally I declined the offer, but thanked him for the attention and went on my way. Since then I’ve tried unsuccessfully to pulse my eye balls and haven’t met anyone else capable of doing it – although Steve does have a capacity for limited eyeball pulsing when he looks at me with real love in his eyes. It’s a lovely thing.

So imagine my surprise this week when Jax, my two and three quarters year old, starting pulsing his eye balls at me!! He’s really getting into it too. Every time you change him, cuddle him or look at him, the little man will look back at you and off go those eyes again. It is truly hilarious and he just bloody loves doing it.

Jax is a very funny little person. He’s constantly practicing new faces to pull, always discovering new tricks with his eyes, and cracking Benny Hill type gags. He’s the member of the family that always finds the light when things are getting a bit serious, and we’re constantly cracking up over his antics. It makes it terribly difficult to get angry with him though, and that is a bit of a problem, because he has this great ability to divert attention away from any naughtiness. We want to appear fair after all.

We love Jaxie and if he turns out to be a stand up comedian one day, we certainly won’t be surprised. His big brother can be a bit intense, so it’s lovely having some balance with a son one who is cruising through life with a cheeky smile most of the time. Don’t get me wrong, he can be a turd too, but on the whole, he’s terrific.

Yours, without the bollocks
Andrea